glorycloud's Diaryland Diary

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God is my life

It is 2:19 PM Friday afternoon here in West Michigan. It is a gray humid hot day. It is 85 degrees and it is predicted to be in the 90's tomorrow.

I got up this morning around 7:34 AM. When I came upstairs I found that Carol had left for a morning walk. I ate breakfast and wrote in my paper diary. Since I had an appointment at 9 o'clock AM with a therapist I did not get out the books I have been reading for morning devotions. When Carol got home from her walk we had devotions and prayed. After prayer I left for my first session with a therapist.

The first session with this therapist was mainly me telling him what lead up to the crisis I had the last week of June 2021. I also once again repeated my life story/the narrative of my life from birth Oakland Calif. August 14 1952 till August 2021. I find it interesting how each time I tell someone my life story what I reveal and what remains not said. There are so many ways one can tell someone their life story from birth to old age/I will 69 years old August 14. I suppose over Time our life story is always going through a process of reinterpretation. We constantly see our lives differently as we come closed to the end of our lives. What was the meaning of our life? As a Christian I confess that God is my life. My life ends in eternal life with God in the New Creation/New Humanity/the Elect Angels.

The first therapy session ended around 10 o'clock AM. I drove to our local public library to start my volunteer shift at the Book Nook the library used books store/Carol had opened the store for me till I got at the Book Nook. I got at the Book Nook around 10:15 AM, volunteer's were already setting up for the upcoming Friends of the Library Used Books Sale starting next Wednesday/the first day of the Sale is opened only those who are members of the Friends of Library. The Book Nook was quiet today so I basically read from a book I bought this morning at the Book Nook titled, 'Scribble, Scribble. Scribble: Writing On Politics, Ice Cream, Churchill, And My Mother' Essays By Simon Schama. I collect the writings of Simon Schama.
https://www.librarything.com/author/schamasimon

Carol showed up at 1 o'clock PM with Josie to take my place. I was feeling sick so I did not stay to help set up for the used books sale. I have not felt good for a couple days. You have good days and you have bad days. The meds I am taking seem to keep me from flipping out. I suppose I do not find it enjoyable telling my life story/dwelling on my Past. I wish I had a golden childhood. But I suppose no childhood is really perfect. I just wish I was constantly God consciousness and not aware of my brokenness/my fallen Self. I like to be able to forget my sinful Self and not be aware of it/be in the Now/presence of the Lord.

Anyway I came home from the Book Nook and wrote in my paper diary. In the mail I received the latest edition Field Notes. Soon Carol and Josie will be home. I will take a half pill of Xanax soon and lay down in the lower level. I need to read something spiritual today before the day comes to a close.

I will close for the time being. Tomorrow is a Saturday.

3:05 p.m. - 2021-08-06

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