glorycloud's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- church It is 2:18 PM Sunday afternoon. I have a headache this afternoon. I am tired, but do not want to take a nap. I sleep better if I do not take a nap in the afternoon. It is painful trying to stay awake during the afternoon. Right now I am out of it mentally. My mind is somewhere else these days. I find myself reliving my Past lately. I am always thinking about the Past. What went wrong? What went right? Life is mysterious. This morning I wrote about me not joining Covenant Presbyterian Church in America. I have been a Christian 44 years old. I went to church for over 37 years. Over the years as a Christian I have attended many churches. I am not against going to church. I wish I had a church to go to on Sundays. In the past I looked for a church to go to on Sundays and found none that I could join with a good conscience. People think because I won't join a church because I want that church to be in accordance to my spiritual convictions that I am being over critical. To me why go to a church just to go to a church. If I do not agree with a certain church for various reasons than why attend? Also how can I have spiritual fellowship with Christians who have no idea of why they go to a certain church? Most people who go to church believe it is the thing one does if they are a Christian, meaning go to church. These folks believe being a Christian is going to a church building at least once a week. A person can go to church and have no relationship with the Lord Jesus is my belief. I have written that I feel extremely uncomfortable around people I do not know. When I am around people I am sure my weirdness becomes visible and then I am forced to defend myself or explain myself, which I find boring and very exhausting. I do not want to explain myself or defend myself to anyone or individual. I just want to be left alone to seek the face of the Lord Jesus Christ among the communion of the saints. Why can't we love one another since we meaning Christians are all members of the Body of Christ. Well as I write I can feel myself falling asleep, so I will close to feel wasted. music: Crowbar "Symmetry In Black" 5:04 p.m. - 2014-06-01 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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